We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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