pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I need moral support for this bender
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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