She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
