Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
