Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
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