Already got asked if we're dating
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Ladies don't puke and tell
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
