Nicole vs. Life
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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