Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
You took a bar mat shot.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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