Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Randomize
