i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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