His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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