i wish my penis had a tongue
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
