He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I came so hard my ears popped.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize