Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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