I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
