Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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