She said her name was "party"
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
