we have officially lost it.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
