I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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