walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
