"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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