i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
You are a genius and a whore.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
