he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
