You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.