You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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