covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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