my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Randomize
