SEEEEXXX PLEASE
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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