Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
it's like iHOP with fire
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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