Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
