Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
well most of my day revolves around power hour
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
