I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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