I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize