sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
