More tranny stories later!
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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