i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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