sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.