dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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