Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
