you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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