@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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