No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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