FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
