Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
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I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
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He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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