i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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