EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
