Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
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I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
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You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
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