You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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