Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
