you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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