The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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